Stories part I
I once had the assignment in a speech class to give a speech that would be an entertaining after dinner speech. I thought long and hard about what to talk about and while discussing the assignment with a friend from word she told me to tell some stories from when I was growing up. She said they always made her laugh, and thought it would be a fun way to give the speech. I Thought about it and agreed.
Growing up in a rural environment can be boring in a lot of ways, but there are ways of getting into trouble that just don't happen in the city. The following are some true examples of them.
Ambush!
A cousin of mine was visiting for a week the summer I was 14. We did all the usual stuff, like horseback riding, fishing, and wrestling around with each other. One day while we were going for a walk, we came to the hay pen of one of the local ranchers. We decided to play a game we invented on the spot and called it "Ambush". To give a description of the hay pen, it was about 150 feet long, and 300 feet long. Picture a football field and you'll have a good idea. The hay in the pen was stacks of alfalfa that resemble giant loaves of bread, 8 feet tall. We would start at opposite ends, and the first one to tackle the other won.
We had played several games and were about even. The last game, I decided to climb up on top of the hay and try to sneak up on him from above. I was doing great, lightly leaping from stack to stack, and making almost no noise. Suddenly I saw him right below me, he had no idea I was there. I set my feet, and made a beautiful diving grab at him. Victory was mine!!!
Now, I didn't realize he knew exactly where I was, and was setting me up. At the last minute he jumped aside and I land face first. I found out 2 things in that instant. 1) Landing face first hurts like hell. And 2) a cow had been standing in that same spot not long before. Yep, I landed face first in a pile of manure, pasture patties, fertilizer, or whatever you want to call it. It was in my nose, my mouth, my eyes, ears and just about everywhere else it could be. I had to go take a dip in the creek just to get somewhat clean before going home.
I guess he won.
___ ___ ___
Fighter planes and horses don't mix.
The area where I grew up was sometimes used as a training area for the Air Force Academy to practice flying under radar. The jets would cruise at about 50 to 100 feet off the ground. They would go so fast that when you heard them, you had to look way out in front of the sound to see them. If they flew directly over you, they would be there almost before you had any warning.
Now, when I was 16, I bought a 2 year old quarter horse filly at a farm auction. I bought her for $90. What a steal!!! They forgot to tell me she had been in pasture her whole life and had never been handled by a human. It was a mini rodeo just to get her into the trailer to get her home. I started working with her each day, at first just being in the corral with her, letting her get used to me. I always did this for a week with any horse I broke. Not that I have broke that many, but I believe in a more gentle approach. I think if a horse trust you, you can get more out of them.
I spent about an hour a day with her, and, after a month, we were making good progress. She would nicer softly when I came out to the corral waiting for her bite of apple that I always took with me. She was well behaved on a halter, and was getting used to a saddle. A couple more weeks, and I was able to sit on her without much stress on her part. A few time in the corral she bucked a little, but not much. She was coming along nicely.
Another month went by, and I decide it was time to take her out of the pen for a little longer ride. We headed across road and out through he field. She was doing great. We weaved in and out of the sagebrush for about a half of a mile, and I stopped for a moment to give her little rest. It was her first ride of this distance and I didn't want to wear her out.
As we turned to head back to the house, one of those fighter planes that I mentioned before zoomed over head. If you have ever seen a startled cat splay all four legs out before running off, I'm thinking that's about how this horse looked. She jumped, and then started to buck with everything she had. I was so startled that I did not have time to get set, and promptly was thrown.
I have mentioned before that there was an abundance of three things where I grew up: sagebrush, rattlesnakes, and....Cactus. I landed flat on my back, with my left hand landing in a pile of cactus. OUCH!!!!!! I get up to find my horse has high-tailed it back to the barn. So here I am, A half mile away from home, no horse, with a hundred cactus needles sticking out of my hand. Life is good.
After the 10 minute walk home, I found the filly standing next to her pen with her head down. She seemed to actually be sorry. I tied her to the fence, went inside and started tweezing the spines out of my hand. My Dad came home, while I was doing this, I told him what happened, He asked if I was okay, then went out to un-saddled the horse and put her away. As soon as he got out the front door. I heard him roar with laughter. At least he didn't laugh in my face.
I think I was still finding cactus in my hand a month later.
___ ___ ___
Hope you enjoyed a little of my pain. More stories to come later.
Deej
Growing up in a rural environment can be boring in a lot of ways, but there are ways of getting into trouble that just don't happen in the city. The following are some true examples of them.
Ambush!
A cousin of mine was visiting for a week the summer I was 14. We did all the usual stuff, like horseback riding, fishing, and wrestling around with each other. One day while we were going for a walk, we came to the hay pen of one of the local ranchers. We decided to play a game we invented on the spot and called it "Ambush". To give a description of the hay pen, it was about 150 feet long, and 300 feet long. Picture a football field and you'll have a good idea. The hay in the pen was stacks of alfalfa that resemble giant loaves of bread, 8 feet tall. We would start at opposite ends, and the first one to tackle the other won.
We had played several games and were about even. The last game, I decided to climb up on top of the hay and try to sneak up on him from above. I was doing great, lightly leaping from stack to stack, and making almost no noise. Suddenly I saw him right below me, he had no idea I was there. I set my feet, and made a beautiful diving grab at him. Victory was mine!!!
Now, I didn't realize he knew exactly where I was, and was setting me up. At the last minute he jumped aside and I land face first. I found out 2 things in that instant. 1) Landing face first hurts like hell. And 2) a cow had been standing in that same spot not long before. Yep, I landed face first in a pile of manure, pasture patties, fertilizer, or whatever you want to call it. It was in my nose, my mouth, my eyes, ears and just about everywhere else it could be. I had to go take a dip in the creek just to get somewhat clean before going home.
I guess he won.
___ ___ ___
Fighter planes and horses don't mix.
The area where I grew up was sometimes used as a training area for the Air Force Academy to practice flying under radar. The jets would cruise at about 50 to 100 feet off the ground. They would go so fast that when you heard them, you had to look way out in front of the sound to see them. If they flew directly over you, they would be there almost before you had any warning.
Now, when I was 16, I bought a 2 year old quarter horse filly at a farm auction. I bought her for $90. What a steal!!! They forgot to tell me she had been in pasture her whole life and had never been handled by a human. It was a mini rodeo just to get her into the trailer to get her home. I started working with her each day, at first just being in the corral with her, letting her get used to me. I always did this for a week with any horse I broke. Not that I have broke that many, but I believe in a more gentle approach. I think if a horse trust you, you can get more out of them.
I spent about an hour a day with her, and, after a month, we were making good progress. She would nicer softly when I came out to the corral waiting for her bite of apple that I always took with me. She was well behaved on a halter, and was getting used to a saddle. A couple more weeks, and I was able to sit on her without much stress on her part. A few time in the corral she bucked a little, but not much. She was coming along nicely.
Another month went by, and I decide it was time to take her out of the pen for a little longer ride. We headed across road and out through he field. She was doing great. We weaved in and out of the sagebrush for about a half of a mile, and I stopped for a moment to give her little rest. It was her first ride of this distance and I didn't want to wear her out.
As we turned to head back to the house, one of those fighter planes that I mentioned before zoomed over head. If you have ever seen a startled cat splay all four legs out before running off, I'm thinking that's about how this horse looked. She jumped, and then started to buck with everything she had. I was so startled that I did not have time to get set, and promptly was thrown.
I have mentioned before that there was an abundance of three things where I grew up: sagebrush, rattlesnakes, and....Cactus. I landed flat on my back, with my left hand landing in a pile of cactus. OUCH!!!!!! I get up to find my horse has high-tailed it back to the barn. So here I am, A half mile away from home, no horse, with a hundred cactus needles sticking out of my hand. Life is good.
After the 10 minute walk home, I found the filly standing next to her pen with her head down. She seemed to actually be sorry. I tied her to the fence, went inside and started tweezing the spines out of my hand. My Dad came home, while I was doing this, I told him what happened, He asked if I was okay, then went out to un-saddled the horse and put her away. As soon as he got out the front door. I heard him roar with laughter. At least he didn't laugh in my face.
I think I was still finding cactus in my hand a month later.
___ ___ ___
Hope you enjoyed a little of my pain. More stories to come later.
Deej
posted by deejinator at 10:26 AM
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